Okayama Part 2:

Osettai 

I wrote earlier about our experience last night at the restaurant, and we had such an interesting experience this evening that I decided to add a new entry.

After enjoying our beer and nuts on the house at the hotel, we decided to venture out into the rain to return to our favourite restaurant, Country Home. We had been invited to return by the family and we decided that this would be a good idea. When we walked in we were warmly received and taken to a nicer part of the restaurant. The night before we'd sat at the cooking bar with shoes on. Tonight we were taken into the back to a place where shoes had to be removed and the tables were sunken. Komangai sat down with us to plan our meal... 

 

...and naturally the discussion turned to where we were off to next. We explained that we were headed to Shikoku and what we hoped to learn from our experiences there. Komangai was very pleased to hear that we were planning to walk and that we were interested in learning about Buddhism. We discussed our plans and she warned us that it would be wet for the next day or two. While we waited for our meal, Komangai returned with several dishes that we hadn't ordered and told us that they were on the house. 

 

After she left again we realized that we had just received our first osettai of our pilgrimage. These are gifts given willingly to a Henro. It is believed that by giving to a pilgrim one is actually giving to Kōbō Daishi. It's considered impolite to refuse an offer of osettai. This culture of giving has been prevalent for hundreds of years and is an important part of the Shikoku Ohenro. Komangai returned a short time later with another dish of calamari that we hadn't ordered. At the end of our meal she returned yet again to sit with us and presented us each with a pair of chop sticks for our journey. We shared names and spoke briefly about our families. She is the mother of five children and her number two son owns the restaurant. Several of her family work there and she has traveled with her family twice to Canada. We were then introduced to two of her sons.

At the end of the evening I told her that she had honoured us and that we would remember her kindness together with she and her family on our pilgrimage. Judging by her reaction I think this was the correct response to the generous osettai, and what she had hoped to hear. The family warmly sent us on our way with a series of bows all round.

We continue to learn each day, and each step closer to Shikoku is helping us to better understand and appreciate the nature of what we are undertaking. Still so much to learn on this journey. We are both feeling very humble tonight with a renewed respect for the hospitality we have experienced in Japan.

Oyasumi nasai!